Written by: Juana
Story summary: Felicity recaps some of the highlights and low points of the past four months to Sally.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in this story. They all belong to the wonderful writers and creators of the hit WB show.
Authors Note: I want to apologize first off to all the wonderful people who have written me in support of my stories. I know it’s been a long dry spell of nothing new, but believe me when I say I do have a really good explanation… I had a baby boy, which my husband and I have named Benjamin! So after much adjustment I am back and I hope you all will enjoy the next installment in my story.
INT: FELICITY’S DORM ROOM: DAY
FELICITY: Dear Sally… I am so excited that you are finally back from your vacation. I think Emmett is pretty great for taking you around the world. I can’t imagine how awesome a trip that must have been… details, I want details! I do have to say though that four months without your advice has been killing me and while you have been absent so much has happened… so very much.
INT: SPICE CLUB: NIGHT
JULIE AND ELENA WALK INTO THE CLUB WITH FELICITY DRAGGING BEHIND THEM. IT IS OBVIOUS THAT SHE DOES NOT WANT TO BE THERE.
FELICITY: I can’t believe I let you talk me into coming here.
ELENA: You need this girl. You have become way too much of a hermit these days.
FELICITY: So I like staying in…sue me.
ELENA: I have no beef with wanting to stay in. It’s the reason you choose to stay in that chaps my hide.
FELICITY: I don’t have any idea what you’re talking about. I stay in because I enjoy the solitude.
ELENA: And the denial just goes on and on.
FELICITY: What’s that suppose to mean?
ELENA: I’ll spell it out for you… BEN.
FELICITY: Ben? You think I stay in because of Ben?
FELICITY: That’s ridiculous. I have no problem with Ben anymore… we’ve even managed to become friends. Ask Julie… she’ll tell you.
JULIE: I don’t know if I’d exactly call you friends. But they are definitely back in the acquaintance department.
ELENA: So then why the solo act? If, like you say, you are over Ben and just want to be his friend?
FELICITY: It’s complicated.
ELENA: Enlighten me.
FELICITY: Okay, fine. Yes… I am over Ben. But that doesn’t mean that memories don’t linger… that regrets don’t surface. I mean I had him back and I let my insecurities get the best of me. I can’t help feeling sometimes that maybe I made a mistake.
ONE MONTH PRIOR:
INT: FELICITY’S DORM ROOM-NIGHT
FELICITY IS SITTING AT HER COMPUTER TYPING WHEN THERE IS A KNOCK AT HER DOOR. SHE FINISHES WHAT SHE IS TYPING AND GOES TO ANSWER IT.
BEN: (smiles shyly) Hi.
FELICITY: What are you… I mean why are you here?
BEN: I need to talk to you.
FELICITY: Oh…um…what about?
BEN: I just…well I need a friend.
FELICITY: A friend?
BEN: Yes…please can you just put all our past crap aside and be my friend for just like an hour?
FELICITY: Ben… I just… I don’t think that’s such a good idea.
BEN: Please Felicity.
FELICITY LOOKING AT BEN CAN TELL THAT HE IS DISTRESSED ABOUT SOMETHING.
FELICITY: Okay… come on in.
BEN COMES IN SHUTTING THE DOOR. HE HEADS OVER AND SITS DOWN IN THE CHAIR. FELICITY GOES AND SITS DOWN ON THE BED FACING HIM.
FELICITY: (CONT.) So what brings you here. I mean it must be something pretty serious for you to come here knowing how I might react.
BEN: It is.
FELICITY: So what is it?
BEN: First… before I tell you what the problem is… I just want you to know that I really appreciate you letting me be here right now. I know I don’t deserve any understanding or forgiveness from you.
FELICITY: Is that what this is about? Us?
BEN: No. I know that’s over. I just wanted you to know that I know it’s over because I screwed up. That I take full responsibility for our breakup.
FELICITY: (a little annoyed) How big of you.
BEN: I just thought you should know.
FELICITY’S GETS UP OFF BED AND HEADS TOWARDS THE DOOR.
FELICITY: (opening door) Fine. Now I know… so if that’s all you have to say…
FELICITY MOTIONS FOR BEN TO LEAVE.
BEN: I got fired.
FELICITY IS STILL STANDING THERE HOLDING THE DOOR.
BEN: The Lucky Lady…my job… I got fired from it.
BEN: It’s a long story.
FELICITY: Ben, I’m sorry… that really sucks.
BEN: Yeah it does. I’m really gonna miss the money.
FELICITY: So what are you going to do now? How are you going to pay your bills?
BEN: I got another job… which is why I’m here.
FELICITY: I don’t understand.
BEN: I wanted to let you know that Javier gave me myjob back at Dean and Deluca.
FELICITY: You're going to be working at D & D again?
BEN: Yes. Which I know is going to be kind of awkward for the both of us.
FELICITY: No… you can’t. I mean…no. You have to go to Javier and tell him thanks but no thanks.
BEN: Felicity… I can’t. I need the money.
FELICITY: So find a job somewhere else. D& D is not the only job in New York.
BEN: I like working there.
FELICITY: I cannot believe you. You are just doing this to be close to me.
BEN: Talk about ego overdrive. Look I came here because I wanted to prepare you for this situation. But I am not going to listen to you accuse me of being obsessed with you. I know that we are over and I accept that. Maybe you should too. Maybe then we could get back some of what we lost.
FELICITY: (calming down) I do know…I’m sorry… you’re right I overreacted. It’s just… it’s stupid I know but somewhere deep down… I can’t accept that everything we had is just…gone. You know?
BEN: (looks longingly at Felicity) I know.
FELICITY STARTS BACK TOWARDS THE BED AND SITS DOWN. SHE LOOKS OVER AT BEN…HESITATING… WANTING TO SAY SOMETHING BUT AFRAID TO. BUT IT’S AS IF BEN IS READING HER MIND.
BEN: (Cont.) Maybe it doesn’t have to be.
BEN: I just think maybe we could… I don’t know… revisit what went wrong with the relationship and maybe fix it.
FELICITY: Ben… I don’t know.
BEN: Felicity, maybe we both want the same thing and we’re just too scared to admit it.
FELICITY: Which is what?
BEN: To get things back to where they were.
BEN GETS UP FROM THE CHAIR AND STARTS WALKING OVER TO FELICITY.
BEN: Come here.
FELICITY AUTOMATICALLY GETS UP OFF THE BED AND HEADS INTO HIS ARMS. THERE BODIES MOLD TOGETHER INSTANTLY AS HE ENFOLDS HER IN A HUG.
BEN: (Whispering in her ear) We can do this…we can.
FELICITY PULLS AWAY TO LOOK INTO HIS EYES. AS BEN AND FELICITY GAZE AT EACH OTHER THE OLD FEELINGS START TO STIR. FEELINGS THAT ARE MADE EVEN MORE INTENSE AS BEN’S MOUTH STARTS RAINING KISSES ON HER FACE AND NECK UNTIL HIS LIPS FINALLY MEET WITH HERS IN A SOUL-STIRRING KISS.
INT: FELICITY’S ROOM-MORNING
FELICITY IS LYING IN BED WITH BEN’S ARMS AROUND HER AFTER A NIGHT OF PASSION BETWEEN THEM. AS FELICITY TURNS TO LOOK AT BEN HE BEGINS TO WAKE UP.
BEN: (still groggy) Morning.
BEN KISSES FELICITY ON THE FOREHEAD AND THEN THE MOUTH.
FELICITY SITS UP IN BED WITH THE SHEET AROUND HER.
FELICITY: So that was…
BEN SITS UP IN BED NOW TOO…EXPOSING HIS CHEST. FELICITY RUNS HER FINGERS OVER HIS NAKED TORSO.
FELICITY: (Cont.) I can’t believe you’re really here.
BEN RUNS HIS HANDS THROUGH FELICITY’S TOUSLED HAIR. WHICH DURING HER INTERIM WITH BEN SHE HAS CUT MUCH SHORTER.
FELICITY IS A LITTLE SELF-CONCIOUS ABOUT THE NEW LENGTH OF HER HAIR AND BEN IMMEDIATELY PICKS UP ON IT.
BEN: I like it. It looks good on you.
FELICITY: I know you really liked the long hair though.
BEN: Yeah… I did. But I really like this new look too.
FELICITY HUGS BEN
FELICITY: You are so great.
FLASH FORWARD FOUR MONTHS:
INT: SPICE CLUB-NIGHT
JULIE: It’s not like you completely blew off the opportunity. I mean you did get back together for a little while.
FELICITY: One week and three days.
ELENA: Long enough to figure out he really was a creep.
FELICITY: He’s not a creep.
ELENA: Then why did you dump him?
FELICITY: Because…honestly…I freaked. I mean the trust between us was already so strained because of how he left me on New Years… When I found out about Tiffany…. I just couldn’t handle it.
FLASHBACK: ONE-MONTH PRIOR
THE LOFT: NIGHT
FELICITY AND BEN ARE IN HIS ROOM. FELICITY IS AGITATED AND BEN IS TRYING TO CALM HER DOWN.
FELICITY: Is it true?
BEN: Felicity… why does it matter?
FELICITY: Then it is.
BEN: We weren’t together.
FELICITY: No…but you were still actively pursing me. I don’t understand you Ben. Did you really think I would get back together with you if you were sleeping with someone else?
BEN: It’s not like that… it was sex Felicity… just sex.
FELICITY: And this is supposed to make me feel better?
BEN: Yes. I love you.
FELICITY: But you slept with her.
BEN: It just happened. Tiffany and I both agreed it was a no strings attached kind of thing. She knew that I was still in love with you.
FELICITY: You picked a really odd way of showing her that.
BEN: I just…I can’t take it back. It happened. Can we please just forget about it?
FELICITY: I can’t just forget about it. I’m sorry. But it really bothers me that while I was pining away for you, you were bedding your ex-girlfriend. You kept telling me you still loved me and you were sleeping with her. Your hypocrisy makes me ill.
BEN: I was not being a hypocrite.
FELICITY: What would you call it then?
BEN: I was lonely… I wanted to be with you, but you just kept rejecting my efforts to get you back. I turned to a friend for comfort.
FELICITY: Comfort? So tell me Ben how many times did Tiffany “comfort” you?
BEN: Felicity this conversation is ridiculous.
FELICITY: No… I want to know.
BEN: I’m not going to have this discussion.
FELICITY: It doesn’t matter… because one time was one time to many.
BEN: What is that suppose to mean?
FELICITY: It means no matter how much I want for us to work… we just never will.
BEN: I can’t believe you’re saying this.
FELICITY: I just think its time that one of us is strong enough to admit that all we seem to be able to do is to hurt each other.
BEN: I never met to hurt you Felicity. It didn’t mean anything to me. You have to believe that.
FELICITY: My head keeps telling me that… but my heart isn’t so forgiving.
INT: SPICE CLUB-NIGHT
ELENA: It’s in the past Felicity… let it go.
FELICITY: Maybe you’re right.
JULIE: Of course she is. And what better place to do that then here… in a club full of available, sexy men.
FELICITY: You are absolutely right. It’s time for me to face it. Ben isn’t coming back, and he is no longer a part of my life… we’re friends and it’s just best that way.
ELENA: That’s my girl. Now lets go get ourselves a drink.
FELICITY: Lead the way.
FELICITY, ELENA AND JULIE HEAD OVER TO THE BAR AND ORDER DRINKS. AS THE BARTENDER IS MAKING THEM ELENA STARTS GLANCING AROUND THE CLUB AND SPOTS SOMEONE.
FELICITY: (cont.) You know I’m really glad you brought me here tonight Elena. I think you’re absolutely right this club is just what I needed.
ELENA: Uh…yeah. You know what…actually I heard about this other club across town. Let’s get Julie and go there instead.
FELICITY: What? Why?
ELENA: Come on it’ll be a blast.
FELICITY: We just ordered drinks.
BARTENDER SITS THEIR DRINKS DOWN IN FRONT OF THEM. ELENA PICKS HERS UP AND DOWNS IT IN ONE GULP.
ELENA: We’ll I’m done. Hurray up and finish yours so we can go.
FELICITY: What is wrong with you?
ELENA: Nothing. Why don’t we go outside and get some air?
FELICITY: Elena, is there something in here you don’t want me to see?
AS FELICITY FINISHES THIS SENTENCE THE CROWD IN FRONT OF HER BEGINS TO THIN AND OUT AND SHE HAS A CLEAR SHOT OF THE TABLE ACROSS FROM HER. BEN IS SITTING THERE WITH LYNN AND KIKI.
A SHOCKED LOOK CROSSES FELICITY’S FACE.
ELENA: We should just go.
ELENA: I’ll go find Julie.
FELICITY: Okay… (still stunned) No… wait. I can’t just run out like that. We agreed when we saw each other that first and foremost we would still be friends.
FELICITY WALKS PURPOSELY OVER TO BEN’S TABLE. NOW IT’S BEN’S TURN TO BE SHOCKED.
FELICITY: I just wanted to say hello…
FELICITY: Well you know how we agreed that we wouldn’t avoid each other… so this is me… not avoiding you.
FELICITY: It’s really good to see you.
BEN: I’m not so sure.
FELICITY: What do you mean?
BEN: I don’t think you’ll feel that way after you find out who I’m here with.
TIFFANY COMES WALKING UP FROM BEHIND FELICITY AND GOES OVER TO BEN AND PUTS HER ARM POSSESSIVELY AROUND HIM.
TIFFANY: Hello Felicity… what brings you here?
FELICITY: You’re here with Tiffany? That’s great…just great. Okay… we’ll I’ve got to go now.
FELICITY TURNS AND STARTS TO HURRY AWAY. BEN STARTS TO GO AFTER HER BUT TIFFANY STOPS HIM.
TIFFANY: Let her go Ben.
BEN: I have to talk to her Tiffany.
TIFFANY: She’s gone Ben… face it.
BEN JERKS HIS ARM OUT OF TIFFANY’S GRASP AND GOES AFTER FELICITY. BUT HE’S TOO LATE THE THREE GIRLS HAVE ALREADY LEFT THE CLUB.
SALLY: Dear Felicity…
I’m sorry for all the drama you and Ben have to continually go through. They say the path to love is never easy. And yes I do believe its love that you and Ben share, no matter how tortured. He loves you and you love him… sooner or later the two of you will not only figure that out, but you will figure out how to make it work. Just remember that timing is everything and it just may not be the right time for the two of you. Never give up hope though. When hope dies so does the wonderful love that I know the two of you are destined to share.